Make My Peace
Jun. 19th, 2006 04:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
browncoat2x2Title: Make My Peace – Round 3 Challenge 1 – Mal's Answer
Author: by 2x2
Word Count: 1084
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Allusions to the movie. Set post BDM.
A/N: Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
big_damn_quests Round 3 Challenge 1: If you knew that this was your last night alive, what would you do?
Well, now. That is a might bit morbid, now, ain't it? My last night alive. Huh.
Guess I'd like to say I'd try to make my peace with everyone on the crew. Conjure I'd share a drink with Jayne, tell him he's a hell of a tracker, and a good man to have in a fight. An' maybe I'd even tell him I seen how much he's grown, become a better man in the time I've known him, not that either of us'd be comfortable with me sayin' it. But we'd sit together, and maybe I'd shake his hand, or clap him on the back. Wouldn't be more'n that with Jayne.
Then I'd go to see lil' Kaylee an' wrap my arms 'round her, give her the kind of hug she's always wantin'. Probably let her kiss my cheek too, as she's wont to do. An' I'd tell her she's the best damn mechanic in the 'verse, an' that she always done me proud, an' that her smile was sometimes the only thing got me through the day. An' I'd tell her I'm happy for her an' Simon. Conjure I might have to lie an' tell her I got somethin' in my eye at some point.
Next I'd go see the Doc. Shake his hand like he's the man he's become, might even call him Simon to his face, just that once. I'd let him know that, even though we ain't never really seen eye to eye, he's done good, and right, protecting his sister like he has. An' that he's a hell of a doctor, an' we all've owed him our lives one time or another. Then I'd tell him to take care of Kaylee an' make her happy, 'cause she's the brightest light that shines in this 'verse, an' if he don't I'll come back and haunt his pi gou. That should get a grin out of his serious face.
Then I'd sit next to my Albatross. Conjure she'd know every damn thing I'd have to say and more, but I'd still say it, just 'cause she likes to hear it. I'd tell her she ain't right, and she'd smile, an' I'd probably be givin' her a hug too. Wouldn't have to say much else. Conjure she might be crying, an' I might wipe away her tears and tell her to take care of Simon and Kaylee for me, an' I know she'd nod, 'cause she's a good girl. An' then she'd run away an' hide, like as not. 's her way.
Talkin' to Zoe'd be hard. We been together so long, ain't hardly nothin' we don't know, one 'bout th' other. But we don't do emotion all that well, me an' Zoe. Expect we'd still be all professional like, as we are, but I think… I think I'd hug Zoe, comradely like at first, but I don’t' think I'd be able to let go so easy, an' I think I'd just hold her past all the uncomfortableness 'till she let herself hold me back. I might tell her I'm sorry, or I might not. She might get tetchy with me, an' I don't need to go out a' this world with Zoe mad at me. But we ain't never really had to say much to know what we mean, just always had that connection 'tween us. An' then I think she'd want me to leave her alone so she could maybe cry in private a bit. An' I think I'd be damn hard pressed to keep my own eyes from leakin', much as I ain't one for lettin' go in that way. Yeah, Zoe'd be hard.
Then there'd only be one person left on board for me to see. Inara. I'd go to her shuttle where she'd be waitin', knowin' I'd be comin'. Don't know that there'd be anything I could really say to her that she don't already know, an' conjure we'd just stand there for a longish moment before I maybe worked up the courage to do what I been wanting to do since the first. I'd take her face 'tween my hands, let my fingers plunge into that hair a' hers, an' then I'd kiss that damned woman for all I'm worth. An' after that I'd like to just hold her close a while, imagine a life what coulda been had we both been different people. I'd try to tell her with a look how I feel, I know she can read that sorta thing in a man's face, 'cause I don’t know that I'd be able to say it. Some things are just too hard.
An' last, I'd take my final walk through Serenity. I'd go back to the engine room and put my hand against her engine casing and just feel her, let her vibrations go through me one last time. I'd go down to the infirmary, and take quick look through the empty passenger dorms, Book's old room. I'd go through the lounge an' then up to the cargo bay, an' I'd stand in the middle and take a good look around her, remember all the times we shared together. Remember games of hoop ball and horseshoes, and sittin' with Inara drinkin' engine wine, and talking on the catwalk; watching Jayne and Book liftin' weights, and Kaylee fixin' on the Mule; first time I set foot on her, an' first time I brought Zoe on board. An' everything else too.
Then I'd head up to the kitchen an' there'd be more memories. Remembrances of times sittin' round that table, all of us together, laughin'. Family. Late night's drinkin' alone, sometimes with Inara or Zoe, or even Jayne. The yellow paint an' flowers'd make me smile.
Then I'd go past the crew's bunks an' smile again at lil' Kaylee's sign. I'd touch Serenity's hull again, pause outside Zoe and Wash's bunk, remember givin' the larger cabin up for them.
An' then it'd be on to the bridge. An' I'd remember Wash sittin' in that chair, with his gorram dinosaurs an' crazy shirts, an' his smart mouth an' the way he could always make Zoe smile. I'd sit down and just feel Serenity around me, hands ghosting over the buttons and switches with the love you can only have for a ship, and we'd stare out at the Black alone together, just me an' Serenity, 'til it happened.
Yeah, that's the way I'd like to say it'd happen.
Truth is, I probably won't do a damn thing.
Author: by 2x2
Word Count: 1084
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Allusions to the movie. Set post BDM.
A/N: Written for
big_damn_quests Round 3 Challenge 1: If you knew that this was your last night alive, what would you do?Well, now. That is a might bit morbid, now, ain't it? My last night alive. Huh.
Guess I'd like to say I'd try to make my peace with everyone on the crew. Conjure I'd share a drink with Jayne, tell him he's a hell of a tracker, and a good man to have in a fight. An' maybe I'd even tell him I seen how much he's grown, become a better man in the time I've known him, not that either of us'd be comfortable with me sayin' it. But we'd sit together, and maybe I'd shake his hand, or clap him on the back. Wouldn't be more'n that with Jayne.
Then I'd go to see lil' Kaylee an' wrap my arms 'round her, give her the kind of hug she's always wantin'. Probably let her kiss my cheek too, as she's wont to do. An' I'd tell her she's the best damn mechanic in the 'verse, an' that she always done me proud, an' that her smile was sometimes the only thing got me through the day. An' I'd tell her I'm happy for her an' Simon. Conjure I might have to lie an' tell her I got somethin' in my eye at some point.
Next I'd go see the Doc. Shake his hand like he's the man he's become, might even call him Simon to his face, just that once. I'd let him know that, even though we ain't never really seen eye to eye, he's done good, and right, protecting his sister like he has. An' that he's a hell of a doctor, an' we all've owed him our lives one time or another. Then I'd tell him to take care of Kaylee an' make her happy, 'cause she's the brightest light that shines in this 'verse, an' if he don't I'll come back and haunt his pi gou. That should get a grin out of his serious face.
Then I'd sit next to my Albatross. Conjure she'd know every damn thing I'd have to say and more, but I'd still say it, just 'cause she likes to hear it. I'd tell her she ain't right, and she'd smile, an' I'd probably be givin' her a hug too. Wouldn't have to say much else. Conjure she might be crying, an' I might wipe away her tears and tell her to take care of Simon and Kaylee for me, an' I know she'd nod, 'cause she's a good girl. An' then she'd run away an' hide, like as not. 's her way.
Talkin' to Zoe'd be hard. We been together so long, ain't hardly nothin' we don't know, one 'bout th' other. But we don't do emotion all that well, me an' Zoe. Expect we'd still be all professional like, as we are, but I think… I think I'd hug Zoe, comradely like at first, but I don’t' think I'd be able to let go so easy, an' I think I'd just hold her past all the uncomfortableness 'till she let herself hold me back. I might tell her I'm sorry, or I might not. She might get tetchy with me, an' I don't need to go out a' this world with Zoe mad at me. But we ain't never really had to say much to know what we mean, just always had that connection 'tween us. An' then I think she'd want me to leave her alone so she could maybe cry in private a bit. An' I think I'd be damn hard pressed to keep my own eyes from leakin', much as I ain't one for lettin' go in that way. Yeah, Zoe'd be hard.
Then there'd only be one person left on board for me to see. Inara. I'd go to her shuttle where she'd be waitin', knowin' I'd be comin'. Don't know that there'd be anything I could really say to her that she don't already know, an' conjure we'd just stand there for a longish moment before I maybe worked up the courage to do what I been wanting to do since the first. I'd take her face 'tween my hands, let my fingers plunge into that hair a' hers, an' then I'd kiss that damned woman for all I'm worth. An' after that I'd like to just hold her close a while, imagine a life what coulda been had we both been different people. I'd try to tell her with a look how I feel, I know she can read that sorta thing in a man's face, 'cause I don’t know that I'd be able to say it. Some things are just too hard.
An' last, I'd take my final walk through Serenity. I'd go back to the engine room and put my hand against her engine casing and just feel her, let her vibrations go through me one last time. I'd go down to the infirmary, and take quick look through the empty passenger dorms, Book's old room. I'd go through the lounge an' then up to the cargo bay, an' I'd stand in the middle and take a good look around her, remember all the times we shared together. Remember games of hoop ball and horseshoes, and sittin' with Inara drinkin' engine wine, and talking on the catwalk; watching Jayne and Book liftin' weights, and Kaylee fixin' on the Mule; first time I set foot on her, an' first time I brought Zoe on board. An' everything else too.
Then I'd head up to the kitchen an' there'd be more memories. Remembrances of times sittin' round that table, all of us together, laughin'. Family. Late night's drinkin' alone, sometimes with Inara or Zoe, or even Jayne. The yellow paint an' flowers'd make me smile.
Then I'd go past the crew's bunks an' smile again at lil' Kaylee's sign. I'd touch Serenity's hull again, pause outside Zoe and Wash's bunk, remember givin' the larger cabin up for them.
An' then it'd be on to the bridge. An' I'd remember Wash sittin' in that chair, with his gorram dinosaurs an' crazy shirts, an' his smart mouth an' the way he could always make Zoe smile. I'd sit down and just feel Serenity around me, hands ghosting over the buttons and switches with the love you can only have for a ship, and we'd stare out at the Black alone together, just me an' Serenity, 'til it happened.
Yeah, that's the way I'd like to say it'd happen.
Truth is, I probably won't do a damn thing.
